Age: 30
Relationship Status: Married
Occupation: Speech-Language Pathologist
Income: $82,000 individual
Astrological Sign: Leo
What is your first thought every morning?
“What’s my to-do list for today?” I am obsessed with lists and have an ongoing checklist in my Notes app.
What is something you do solely for you?
Go on my outdoor podcast walks. I also get my nails done every month, and as boring as it sounds, I love to go grocery shopping because it makes me feel productive.
What is something you dread?
Unfortunately, work. I pride myself on having a rewarding career that makes a difference, yet I still find myself absolutely dreading it every day. It worries me that I’m not in the right field.
What is something you are looking forward to?
My baby girl being born. I’m 9 months pregnant now and have never looked forward to anything more in my life. I can’t wait to look her in the eyes, have her look back at me, and watch her grow.
When do you feel most accomplished?
At the end of a long day, when I’ve moved my body, somewhat socialized, cleaned, had an everything shower, and cooked dinner.
What is something you regret investing in financially?
Following every fashion trend. Every few months, there seem to be new fashion trends, and I used to (although admittedly, I still do it occasionally) give in and buy tons of new clothes only to find that I only wear them 1-2 times before the next trend starts. I started investing in more staple pieces that can be accessorized, which has helped a lot.
What is something you regret investing in emotionally?
Relationships with selfish, unaware people. Also, friendships with people that constantly talk sh*t about others. It made me paranoid and always had me thinking, “Well, what do they say about me or my husband?” Now that I’ve matured, I feel sorry for people who have nothing better to talk about than other people they really don’t know much about.
What are three things you think are absolutely worth the investment?
(financially, emotionally, or time/energy-wise)
Financially: A nice mattress, a reliable car, and a trip to a new place every couple of years to keep life exciting.
Emotionally: Setting boundaries and learning to say “no” to things/ events/ people that do not make me happy. Another big one I am still trying to work on is letting things go more easily and not taking things to heart so much.
Time/energy-wise: Making an effort with relationships I really value, specifically with family. This means making long drives to see my siblings, giving up weekend plans with friends to go see my parents, etc.
When do you feel most creative?
After I clean. I think more clearly and creatively when I’m surrounded by a clean environment.
How often do you compare yourself to others? When?
Constantly. I’ve had crippling body image issues since I was 14 years old, and it’s only gotten worse with age. Now, as an adult, I also regretfully find myself comparing myself to people’s financial situation, which is icky. Like when people buy a house or a new car, I find myself thinking, “Wow, I can’t afford that. They must make so much more money than I do. I wish I had more money.”
What is one thing you’d like to thank your past self for?
For never giving up on what I always knew I was capable of, no matter how badly I wanted to. It took me YEARS to get accepted into graduate school, but I kept on working as an assistant, making barely any money and applying. It was all worth it.
What is one thing you believe about your future self?
I am going to be an amazing mom to my kids and I will love them unconditionally.
What is one thing you learned in childhood that you have now had to unlearn in adulthood?
You don’t have to keep your struggles a secret from others – it doesn’t mean you’re weak. My mom was sick when I was growing up, and she never let anyone outside of the family know. There was something admirable about her not wanting that type of attention from others and using her own strength to get through it, but it also conditioned my siblings and me to never really talk about or face our emotions.
Have you ever felt pure joy? When?
Thankfully, I feel a lot of pure joy often because I don’t take things for granted. I feel pure joy when I spend time with my family and husband, above all.
What is something that would feel really good to get off your chest?
I have some built-up resentment towards a few people, which has made me push many other people away to avoid BS and drama. I have become too comfortable being alone and only seeing my husband lately, and I don’t want to make that too much of a habit.
When do you feel most in your feminine energy?
When I’m with my girlfriends. Doing anything with them really – yapping, getting ready, listening to music, going to the bathroom together on a night out. I love girlhood.
What is one interaction that changed your life?
One of my old clients was the same age as me. He did a backflip on a trampoline, broke his neck, and became completely paralyzed from the neck down. I worked with him on feeding because he lost a lot of oral motor control, making it difficult to swallow food safely. We liked all the same things – music, movies, etc. but his life changed forever because of one single moment. It made me realize how precious life is, how quickly things can change, and to NEVER judge someone by how they look. From an outsider’s perspective, and I saw it firsthand, people looked at him like he couldn’t think or communicate for himself because of his disability, which was so far from the truth.
What is something you want to give up?
Being self-deprecating. I’ve developed a habit of putting myself down in uncomfortable moments to make others laugh or feel good, but in return, it makes people think that I’m not as intelligent or sensitive as I really am.
What is something you want to take up?
Therapy. I’ve been saying this for years and repeatedly make excuses for myself that I’m “too busy” or it would be “too awkward” or “too expensive,” but I have a lot I could work on and learn from investing in my mental health more.
What do you believe is a universal truth?
No amount of guilt can change the past, and no amount of anxiety can change the future.
BONUS: Tell me something good.
“May you always be the one who notices the little things that make the light pour through, and may they always remind you: there is more to life, and there is more to you.”
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