Age: 30
Relationship Status: Engaged
Occupation: Graphic Designer
Income: 30k
Astrological Sign: Sagittarius
What is the most important part of your daily routine?
Going to the gym in the morning before work. I’m not a gym girlie, but it does make me feel like I’ve accomplished something.
What is your current happiness most dependent on?
My partner and I are looking for a house, which is very stressful, so if we were to find one, I’d be very happy!
What do you wish you were less reliant on?
Other people’s opinions. I’m starting to realize that they really don’t matter; it’s my opinion that matters most.
When do you question yourself?
A lot of the time, it is something I’m working on.
What is something that has positively impacted how you perceive your self-worth?
I recently worked with a therapist, and I didn’t realize how harsh I was being on myself and how that was affecting my self-worth, so I’ve started to make a conscious effort to be kinder to myself.
What is something you have forgiven yourself for?
I’m in the process of forgiving myself for how I protected myself when I was younger. When you go through trauma as a child, you do things to protect yourself that later on in life turn up and impact you negatively. For me, it’s been anxiety and always looking at the worst-case scenario. Now that I’m older, I can tackle these things and know that everything will be okay.
What is something you have forgiven someone else for?
My brother for how he has treated me in the past. Even though we both experienced the same childhood trauma, I’ve learned that he has dealt with it in a very different way from me. I can understand the hurt he feels and have empathy for him. In order for me to heal, I have to forgive his actions so they don’t hold me down anymore.
How do you ground/center yourself?
I sit in a quiet spot and have a cup of tea to rest my mind. I’ll also talk to my partner or mum.
What is one thing that helped you through your most difficult time?
My mum. My dad died when I was 7, and I can’t even imagine what my mum was going through, but she raised my brother and I on her own, and she has always been there for us. Anything I go through, no matter how tough, she is there for me.
Have you ever felt like the best version of yourself? When?
There was a time when I was doing great with my diet and exercise, which made me feel good. I’m trying to get back into it.
What is something you fundamentally disagree with?
When people say that smoking weed isn’t as harmful as other drugs and that it just chills you out.
What is something you know for sure?
That no matter what comes my partner and I’s way, we will tackle it together. We are there for each other no matter what.
What are three of your non-negotiables in romantic relationships?
Is someone I can rely on.
Has a good sense of humor.
Doesn’t do drugs.
When do you feel most comfortable in your own skin?
My partner just has this way of looking at me and telling me that I’m beautiful, and I know it really comes from the heart.
Have you ever been in awe of something/someone? When?
As I’ve got older and approaching the age that my mum lost her husband, I’m just in awe of how she carried on and raised us. She was grieving a life she didn’t get to live with her husband and grieving a life her children wouldn’t have with their dad. I can’t even imagine my partner passing away at this age. I feel like my mum doesn’t even realize how strong she is; she’s absolutely amazing! I wish she had an easier life.
What is the best (physical/material) gift you have ever received?
Last Christmas, my fiancé bought me a bracelet that had mine, my mum and dad's birthstones. It was such a special moment as my dad died when I was 7. I just burst into tears at how thoughtful my partner had been.
What is one thing you will always say ‘no’ to in the future?
A workplace that doesn’t align with my values.
What do you believe is your most attractive quality?
My thoughtfulness.
What/who do you want to be when you grow up?
I want to be more confident and to care less about what other people think.
BONUS: Tell me something good.
I am currently making a This Is Your Life book about my dad. He died when I was 7, and I don’t have a lot of memories of him, so I want to learn about his life and build a connection with him. It is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do, but it feels like the right time to do it. I’ve been in contact with many people, and their support and kindness blew me away in helping me. I know my brother has issues that probably stem from losing our dad so young, so I’m hoping this helps him. When people ask me about my dad, I’ll be able to tell them all about him, something I’ve never done before. Also, if I have kids, I can share this book with them to tell them about their grandad so he is never forgotten.
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