Age: 32
Relationship Status: Common law
Occupation: Finance
Income: ~$120K
Astrological Sign: Scorpio
What is the most important part of your daily routine?
Me time. I have a voracious appetite for time alone to recharge, relax, and do something or nothing as I wish.
What is your current happiness most dependent on?
A well-thought-out balance between career, relationships, creative/artistic hobbies, and therapy.
What do you wish you were less reliant on?
The female body ideal of being slim and toned. I had eating disorders for a year in my late teens and am still anxious about not being able to maintain this ideal as I age.
When do you question yourself?
When I think about my long-term life goals and am still not sure if I want to commit to having children.
What is something that has positively impacted how you perceive your self-worth?
Therapy 100%. The most valuable takeaway was that people failed me when I was younger and not the other way around, and I had always tried my best to survive and grow.
What is something you have forgiven yourself for?
Lashing out at other people in my teens when I was unconsciously grieving my father’s death. I didn’t stop suppressing the grief until my thirties.
What is something you have forgiven someone else for?
I have a very low threshold for other people’s bullshit due to past traumas and am not afraid to call them out or cut them off. I hold grudges and am sensitive to hurtful albeit unintentional remarks from others. That said, I have forgiven my mother for all the damage she has caused me.
How do you ground/center yourself?
Doing nothing. That includes browsing on my phone for hours on end because I enjoy it and taking long walks where I think about anything or everything.
What is one thing that helped you through your most difficult time?
Functionally impairing obsession with fictional characters (as a child and teenager) or real people in my life (as an adult). I unconsciously used obsession to escape mental illnesses, which in turn became its own hell. It was the catalyst for my seeking professional help.
Have you ever felt like the best version of yourself? When?
When I’m playing piano or writing a short story, everything falls into place.
What is something you fundamentally disagree with?
Cultural relativism.
What is something you know for sure?
That I have always been deeply loved by my parents.
What are three of your non-negotiables in romantic relationships?
Ability to communicate, take accountability, and effect meaningful changes.
Commitment to each other’s well-being and long-term common goals.
Sexual compatibility.
When do you feel most comfortable in your own skin?
When I’m alone or in the company of people I trust.
Have you ever been in awe of something/someone? When?
My father. He was gentle, kind, child-like. He loved and respected me. I am happy thinking that I will eventually join him one day.
What is the best (physical/material) gift you have ever received?
Raw courage from my mother and artistic sensitivity from my father.
What is one thing you wish you had said ‘yes’ to in the past?
Pursuing a master’s in the UK. It would have been an amazing opportunity to live and work in the country for a while afterward.
What is one thing you will always say ‘no’ to in the future?
Minimizing my own needs to maintain a dysfunctional attachment and escape past traumas.
What do you believe is your most attractive quality?
Intelligence combined with kindness.
What/who do you want to be when you grow up?
A writer. I will never stop writing.
BONUS: Tell me something good.
Squirrels get fat in the fall/winter.
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